started off with lazy thoughts of going to do the boring and disgusting task of cleaning people's teeth(scaling).Today was the first day of this posting in this cycle,which means ,it's been quite some time since I did this job.... there's always this starting trouble when I get to each posting.. to add on is the heat ...and to make things worse, the head cap and the mask...
It was my turn to do my third case , was about to call his name.. when my Asst.Professor asked me to take up another patient instead...I'd already noticed this girl who had been sitting alone and had taken a second look at her.. She had sunken eyes, closed... She was blind.. later got to know that she had lost her eyesight at the age of 5 due to some growth.
Though I was quite eager to treat this girl,I had my concerns too, as to how I would deal with her.Got her seated in the chair with her mother's help and then got to doing my work.She began crying in between with pain,or probably because she didn't exactly know what I was doing on her.I tried my best with my not so fluent Tamil and finally ended my treatment plucking out one of her milk teeth too(because of the force and besides, it was time for it to fall out... though not part of the treatment plan,not an error...mind you...)
May be this sounds simple and silly,but personally it gave me good satisfaction of having treated such a patient.
The day then moved on and on my way back home,while waiting for the bus,I saw a disturbing sight... a man half nude with raw flesh exposed on his left arm ,was lying near the bus stop.I turned my head around. But then my curiosity made me have another look at the pathetic sight of that man who was just skin and bones.I guess he is mentally ill and needs help. God help him,though it's quite unfair to say that ,having done nothing even after seeing him in that state.
All this makes me wonder, is it really right of me to be cribbing over all that I'm not able to do , achieve or enjoy?Am I doing what I should be doing? I'm confused... confused as always...
Friday, April 24, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
Luck, Destiny or our own decisions?
Which of these really determine our future ? I wonder… I have heard people telling that they decide what they want to achieve and they do. But it never seems to work with me.Things don’t happen when I want them to and good things in life come totally unexpected. I’ve observed that people who are expected to make it big, often do not and many who don’t seem that capable go places.. Isn’t that luck?or as many say it’s all written, their destiny…. But without a doubt our decisions have an important role too. But when to take what decisions is the big question.
I’m almost nearing the next crossroads in my life. And the questions and thoughts in my mind are endless.My mind is in a total mess at times. How is my future going to be like? What next? What is going to be best for me? Should I continue in my field or change it altogether? Is this what I really want?will I be happy with this?It just goes on and on, making my myself more confused than ever, each time I think about it. Where I have reached now is definitely not just my decision,neither is it luck, and is it destiny? I do not know. Hope all this gets sorted out at the earliest and my brain gets oriented. The sooner the better for me.
I’m almost nearing the next crossroads in my life. And the questions and thoughts in my mind are endless.My mind is in a total mess at times. How is my future going to be like? What next? What is going to be best for me? Should I continue in my field or change it altogether? Is this what I really want?will I be happy with this?It just goes on and on, making my myself more confused than ever, each time I think about it. Where I have reached now is definitely not just my decision,neither is it luck, and is it destiny? I do not know. Hope all this gets sorted out at the earliest and my brain gets oriented. The sooner the better for me.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
FRIENDS FOREVER????
Friends 4ever….
Friendship–the ship that never sinks…
Oft written statements in slam books and autographs, when it’s time to bid farewell to your set of friends in each phase of life… 10th,12th, final year in college…or even when you shift schools…..But do they really make sense? Most often not, at least that’s what I’ve been observing or rather experiencing. In spite of all opportunities to keep in touch , thanks to all the technological advancements, there are very few friends whom I’m still in touch with(of course, I do accept I may have been responsible for that),very whom I care about or who care about me. Even the best of friends at one time turn out to be totally estranged, or end up making courtesy calls once in a while.
There was a time when I never really understood backstabbing by friends, and felt really upset when I realized that those whom I’d considered best friends were not to be. Now, many have come and gone, a few still remain, who I hope to have for a lifetime.There are others who I know are just transitory, friends for the present. At times it’s best not to expect much and get a good surprise, rather than expecting the most ideal things and getting disappointed… May be this can tag me a pessimist, but that’s how it works better for me…. Though I’ll be more than happy if I can have good friends all through my life… And I do respect the views of all those who believe in “friends forever” and admire those who are able to maintain so.
Love you …all my friends…!!!
Friendship–the ship that never sinks…
Oft written statements in slam books and autographs, when it’s time to bid farewell to your set of friends in each phase of life… 10th,12th, final year in college…or even when you shift schools…..But do they really make sense? Most often not, at least that’s what I’ve been observing or rather experiencing. In spite of all opportunities to keep in touch , thanks to all the technological advancements, there are very few friends whom I’m still in touch with(of course, I do accept I may have been responsible for that),very whom I care about or who care about me. Even the best of friends at one time turn out to be totally estranged, or end up making courtesy calls once in a while.
There was a time when I never really understood backstabbing by friends, and felt really upset when I realized that those whom I’d considered best friends were not to be. Now, many have come and gone, a few still remain, who I hope to have for a lifetime.There are others who I know are just transitory, friends for the present. At times it’s best not to expect much and get a good surprise, rather than expecting the most ideal things and getting disappointed… May be this can tag me a pessimist, but that’s how it works better for me…. Though I’ll be more than happy if I can have good friends all through my life… And I do respect the views of all those who believe in “friends forever” and admire those who are able to maintain so.
Love you …all my friends…!!!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Dreaming BIG…..,
...following it and reaching the Zenith…. Things oft read in biographies of great people or celebrities…. If you ask me what made me think about this now, it’s a few real life incidents which I happened to listen to from others and read from the newspaper…
This one being the most striking one(the one from the paper)- The story about a Marwari girl from a village, who got married at the age of 18, later going as high up the ladder of success ,as being the first woman of Indian origin to hold the post of the President of a University in the US…. I wonder, am I too content with where I stand? Happy with the secure life I’m enjoying? Am I dreaming not big enough and hence my chances of reaching heights, sleek?
It’s confusing…
Dreams are many… even the smallest ones seem impossible at times… Though the stories of the most impossible dreams coming true are projected, isn’t the contrary more common? People getting disappointed and dejected, when they don’t achieve what they want? I’ve often felt it’s easier to dream and reach great heights when you have nothing to lose and you have to start from scratch….In the end, I think it’s easier taking things the way they come your way….no high hopes or their fall….
But I’m sure each of us have our secret dreams, big and small, as is human nature to want more and more…. Hope all of them come true, with hard work or ease ….
These are just the various thoughts I had in the last 2 days, a reflection of my confused mind, as is evident from the many question marks in between…
This one being the most striking one(the one from the paper)- The story about a Marwari girl from a village, who got married at the age of 18, later going as high up the ladder of success ,as being the first woman of Indian origin to hold the post of the President of a University in the US…. I wonder, am I too content with where I stand? Happy with the secure life I’m enjoying? Am I dreaming not big enough and hence my chances of reaching heights, sleek?
It’s confusing…
Dreams are many… even the smallest ones seem impossible at times… Though the stories of the most impossible dreams coming true are projected, isn’t the contrary more common? People getting disappointed and dejected, when they don’t achieve what they want? I’ve often felt it’s easier to dream and reach great heights when you have nothing to lose and you have to start from scratch….In the end, I think it’s easier taking things the way they come your way….no high hopes or their fall….
But I’m sure each of us have our secret dreams, big and small, as is human nature to want more and more…. Hope all of them come true, with hard work or ease ….
These are just the various thoughts I had in the last 2 days, a reflection of my confused mind, as is evident from the many question marks in between…
Friday, January 2, 2009
NOSTALGIA.....
Glass Bangles…….. just happened to dig them out of the bag in which they’ve remained unpacked, ever since we shifted form Mumbai .That was 2 and a half years back, part of the back packing we’ve always had and got used to, in fact enjoyed a lot of times..
Yes the bangles.. Blue and red…. they took me down the memory lane…. Back to our old house in Kizhakkumpattukara, our first own sweet house(which is no more ours),the only place we’ve stayed for 7 years together, where we’ve most of our childhood memories. As I write this, I miss our bedroom there, painted Mauve as per our choice, where we used to arrange Christmas and new year cards during this season on our window…
And these bangles were bought from an old man who used to come there especially during the Onam vacations ,calling out “kuppivala….” And my mother would call him and buy us bangles…. Now it seems like a distant past.
Things I doubt my children will get to see, experience or enjoy….
p.s. for the 1 or 2 readers I’ve got, I hope this one has some improvement…
and due to technical difficulties, wasn’t sure if this baby of mine would get delivered
today…and if it hadn’t, probably it would’ve become a miscarriage
Yes the bangles.. Blue and red…. they took me down the memory lane…. Back to our old house in Kizhakkumpattukara, our first own sweet house(which is no more ours),the only place we’ve stayed for 7 years together, where we’ve most of our childhood memories. As I write this, I miss our bedroom there, painted Mauve as per our choice, where we used to arrange Christmas and new year cards during this season on our window…
And these bangles were bought from an old man who used to come there especially during the Onam vacations ,calling out “kuppivala….” And my mother would call him and buy us bangles…. Now it seems like a distant past.
Things I doubt my children will get to see, experience or enjoy….
p.s. for the 1 or 2 readers I’ve got, I hope this one has some improvement…
and due to technical difficulties, wasn’t sure if this baby of mine would get delivered
today…and if it hadn’t, probably it would’ve become a miscarriage
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